Sunday, April 6, 2014

Our Love Story

There seems to be a recent revival in our ward regarding temple and family history work...go to the temple, they say; index some names, they declare; clean up family search, they propose.  Though we regularly attend the temple, every time they say the word index I slink in my chair or look at the couple behind me as if they single-handedly dropped the ball for the whole ward and need to start indexing a thousand names to make penance. This week, however, they reminded us that a key part of family history is keeping a record of our own personal history. They challenged us to tell our love story, since that is something EVERYBODY wants to read of course. So here it is...

Michelle and I like to think it was fate, or the spirit, or the four elements (earth, wind, water, fire) that brought us together. Before meeting in the Brownstone apartment complex in August of 2013 we both were living in and planning to continue live in locations on the opposite side of town from each other. In a fortuitous turn of events (I couldn't afford to live at old mill and felt I needed a change in place) I moved into Brownstone late in the semester. Michelle, who had been planning to live in a house in town also changed her plans late in the game to end up at Brownstone.

At this point Michelle was nearing graduation and I had just come out of a breakup (I ended it) and starting a graduate program and neither of us were really looking to date. Having said that, I knew that later in the semester I would shake myself out of my post relationship woes and be on the prowl once again so that first Sunday at church I did what any respectable young Provo man would do and identified all of the girls I thought I might want to ask out in the ward. Needless to say Michelle made the list. She walked into church and was such a commanding figure (she had great posture, beautiful curly red hair, and a jawline that is to die for...among the thousand or so other wonderful qualities I cannot list here) that I couldn't help but think--"I need to ask her out."

This was confirmed for me when I was walking out to my car on a sunny day and she was sitting out in what we called "the Gap" between the men and women's sides of the complex. I thought, "wow, she likes to study outside on a nice day--this is my kind of girl." I said hi, and probably tried to garble out some witty remark that resembled something like chewbacca choking on his chewing gum mid yodel.

Right about the time I decided I was ready to date again!!....I saw Michelle holding hands with another guy in the ward. Ugh, Aaaah. By that point I had pretty much made up mind that Michelle was the one I was interested and her new relationship was worth waiting out until another someone caught my eye.  Fortunately, the relationships was short lived and Michelle was single again in about a month (which in thesis time feels like about a day--so I didn't have to wait long at all). I waited the courtesy week and then began to plot.

Don't read into this next event too much because I've always been cautious to make any assumptions about being in the temple with a girl my age at the same time. To clarify...being in the temple with another single person who happens to be a female is not a sign from God that she is "the one." Having said that, Michelle and I were both attending a ward temple day and for different reasons decided to do a sealing session and not join the ward for other activities. I walked into the office right behind her and they asked if we were together. She looked back with a sneer and said "no" in a tone that says "are you kidding me." (I'm embellishing of course--I think her tone was quiet neutral). We went into the session together and within minutes she was out the door with a bronchial cough that shook the room and echoed in the hallways. I thought, "yikes," then thought, "I wonder if she needs help," then when she didn't return I thought, "this is my chance!!!" Later that day I sent out a subtle but significant text just asking how she was doing and if she needed anything and the flood gates to her heart were opened.

Within a few days I called and invited her on a date. Our first date was to a photo exhibit in the HVAC hosted by a friend of mine and a visit to the MOA. We followed up with a little ice-cream and chatter and I think that's when we both thought, okay, this person doesn't have totally psychotic viewpoints, has good taste in ice-cream and can converse intelligently about sensible things (prior to this point I had dated younger girls and wasn't accustomed to such refined tastes :) )....needless to say, I new there'd be a second date if she'd have me....

[there are gaps to be filled here but I want to skip ahead to the engagement]

Did I mention that today is the anniversary to the day I proposed to Michelle? Let's talk a little bit about that. First of all I have to say that Michelle and I were very open in our courtship about the prospect of marriage. We frequently would talk and say things like "at this point, if things continue as they are, we'll be getting married." And the nice thing was, for the first time ever that thought brought me total peace. There was no anxiety or doubt at all about the prospect of marrying Michelle. In reality we actually had the papers from the temple announcing our sealing reservation long before I actually proposed...that was how much we talked about it.

As an aside, one funny detail that I have to include is that a few months prior to this point when Michelle and I first became official she had actually been on a date with another guy that very same day (I know, the crowd just gasped). She hadn't been courting him at the same time but we weren't official and she was still on the fence and this guy asked her out and she went. The way she describes it is that the date was weird (probably just to console me) and that night we held hands and became official. Our hands were a hot, sweaty mess but we felt close and it was nice. As Michelle left she said "so...are we officially dating" and I of course said something like "as far as I'm concerned we are." And that was that.

Okay, back to the engagement. I wanted to do something special but the thesis had drained me of all creative energies. If I were to go back I would have done things a little different but there must have been enough intrigue cause she still said yes. I can't imagine if she had said, well I was really into it but than your proposal kind of sucked so...ya, sorry about that, I'm going to have to say no on this one. Heehee.

Here's how it went down. There is a really romantic tree swing by the Provo river in South West Provo. I wanted to take Michelle there and then setup a candle lit picnic with flowers (okay in retrospect this is sounding better than I thought). I wasn't super anxious (because we already had a wedding date) by I was worried that there would be bugs or that something would go wrong. Turns out a family of smokers had beat me to the tree swing and didn't seem in any rush to be leaving. I turned to Michelle and said, maybe we should go somewhere else. She thought we were just picnicking after conference but I'm sure was becoming increasingly suspicious (I was wearing what I had worn on our first date and had brought food from the date where we became official). We ended up at Paul Ream park under one of the pavilions, thankfully, because it began to rain. The rain was a nice touch. As we sat and pulled out food I set out a bouquet of flowers, a candle, and some nicer table settings (she was definitely on to me) and then we bowed our heads to pray.

This is where it gets juicy...I wanted to have the ring open and facing her when she opened her eyes from the prayer but in the middle of the prayer she peaked while my hand was still in my bag and said "what's going on over there" and I was frantically urging her to close her eyes and finish the prayer. Being the strong willed woman that I love she would not close those eyes of course so I pulled out the ring and asked her to marry me. She said yes, we got teary and hugged and then decided we probably ought to finish praying. We ate the tin foil dinners we had packed earlier in the day, enjoyed the rain, and mulled over the fact that we were officially engaged and thought about all of the people we would get to call and share the news with that night.

All I can say is I'm so glad she said yes and look forward to an eternity with Michelle thanks to the restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ and the sealing power.

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