Had we known the film would leach away our precious time and energy with painfully prolonged, pretentious scenes of spacecrafts and alien deserts, we never would have left home last evening.
Despite being pleased with the last half a dozen films we had seen at BYU IC we were sorely disappointed by this acclaimed cult classic. In danger of sounding like a heretic I will acknowledge the following: FOR ITS TIME, the cinematography, scientific speculation and accuracy, and music score were likely unparalleled. However, as one who tends to appreciate the historical arts, I was more than happy to walk out of the plebeian movie (grateful to have paid nothing) at the hour mark, whilst an hour and forty minutes remained.
Fortunately we were preceded by 2 Dozen people, otherwise we might have felt sheepish slipping out early. AND, After reading the predictable synopsis upon our return home (in less than on minute) we felt satisfied with our decision and luckily saved the evening with a few episodes of Studio C.
Michelle: To be honest, this movie has never been anywhere close to the top of my to-see list. But, I figured it was probably a good one to sit through, to glean whatever bits of value and cultural importance I could. Garrett's suggestion that we see this cult-classic film was the motivation I needed to actually view it. I'll also confess that I didn't research the premise of the movie at all, and had no idea what to expect or be prepared for. I only vaguely remember seeing bizarre clips from it as a child (the big floating fetus, Hal's red glowing light, and the fluffy pink Ikea style chairs), and was only mildly interested to see how they fit together in the movie.
Fortunately, we made no-bake cookies ahead of time to sneak into the show in the event of a mid-boredom stupor. This was wisdom on our part.
As I previously mentioned, I had no idea what to expect (other than the glowing light, pink fuzzy chairs, and a baby in space), so when a pretty Utah landscape with apes pulled up to the screen, I decided to squash my incredulity and wait it out. The next thirty minutes brought occasional bursts of stifled laughter, as I silently coached the ape-actors on their non-apelike presentation. I tried to draw parallels between the evolution and values of man to what was happening on screen. And then I got bored. When they never brought back the baby apes (portrayed by actual baby apes (so cute!) and not actors), I slumped down in my seat and broke into a cookie that Garrett (also slumped over) offered me.
FINALLY we were permitted a bit of action and change of scene. (A gigantic domino piece magically appears, and, we are led to believe, instigates the behavior of blood lust among the apes).
I won't rehash the entire movie. Ahm.... Or rather the 60 minutes we sat through. I'll just say it was unbelievably and painfully long. Spending three minutes to show a space station peacefully spinning in the heavens would try anyone's patience. It's like trying to sing a perky upbeat hymn (Welcome Welcome, Sabbath Morning; Put Your Shoulder to the Wheel; There is Sunshine in my Soul Today; etc.) at the pace fit for a funeral dirge. As Garrett mentioned, many people left the theater around the same time. As we packed away the cookie wrappers, I was amused to see the reactions of audience members still present:
Slack jawed and bleary eyed (I assumed they were there for a class assignment)
Wide eyed and attentive (movie cult followers)
Asleep (influenced by the award-winning musical score)
In my opinion, it's irritatingly cryptic, pretentiously artistic, and agonizingly slow.
After complaining/exclaiming to several individuals, my dad remarked that it's rumored the writers and producers were on LSD. I would believe it folks. It seems that certain movies contain elements that would lend themselves nicely to a trip.
All bitterness aside, we look forward to our next trip to the International Cinema!
We recently saw a Spanish horror film, The Orphanage, that was deliciously and beautifully done. (I speak as a horror-movie pansy).
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